5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
