party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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