This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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