Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
