all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
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