I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
its liver damage thursday
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
