rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
