Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
ugly people sure do ruin things
stop calling my apartment porn island.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
