chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
