we're chasing vodka with high fives
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Mom said you looked used
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
