so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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