I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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