Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
