you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
