he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
