the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize