would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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