Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
