shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize