it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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