Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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