Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
