There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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