If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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