Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
