Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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