I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
