I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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