i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He told me they were just razor bumps!
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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