My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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