I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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