We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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