he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
