I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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