Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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