Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
People in love make me want to vomit
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
