yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
