I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
