I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Four minutes until I can fart!
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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