and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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