life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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