Don't make out with my wife yet
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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