Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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