your thong is hanging out like whoa
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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