Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
