4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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