it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
