All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize