North Korea, Best Korea!
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
