yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I'm passing your future prison.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
